20 December 2017: Open your Heart and the Laume

Hello old friends,

It’s been a while. My faerie cards are currently MIA, and my book got lost in the move (I think it was put in a charity box by mistake, which means my beloved dog chewed, dog-eared copy of the Faeries Oracle needed to continue its journey without me). My cards are somewhere in the chaos of my house, but I bought a new deck so that I could read the manual when I needed to. And so today, the new cards were opened up, when I needed clarification from another deck.

As a general rule, I don’t collect tarot decks. Once I discovered my Faeries Oracle deck, it fitted and so I happily passed on my old tarot deck which I loved in the store and was happy with but wasn’t really fitting to a dear friend who uses it to this day, and fits her perfectly.

But, one day, I was offered solace of an oracle reading by a lovely lady, Viviene (I think her name was) at Stones for Africa in Fourways when she overheard me have a really distressed conversation with my dad. The reading was with “The Answer is Simple” oracle cards and since then, I went if I ever encountered the deck while out and about I would purchase it, but I would not order it specifically. Not too long ago, someone posted in a Facebook group about moving overseas and selling some books and the like, and this included a copy of these cards. And so, I bought them.

Today, I decided I needed a bit of guidance and so I drew a card. The card is entitled:  “Open Your Heart”, and the guidebook says, inter alia,

To love yourself and experience all the blessings your Spirit offers, you must have an open heart. You can’t fully experience love of any sort —that of self or otherwise — if it isn’t open. … It’s especially important right now to open yourself up, because life is trying to deliver you the gift of love. Your Spirit and the Divine Source of all Life knows exactly what your core needs and is more than willing to supply that and so much more — but it can’t succeed if you are not prepared to receive the blessings it wants to rain on you.

This all sounds pretty good, except for one minor detail, at the moment I am stuck on the “How”. And so, I went and got the new Faeries Oracle deck and asked “How do do I open my heart?” To which, The Laume (she of unconditional giving and receiving) reminded me a lot of the stress that I am carrying at the moment is all linked to emotional labour and it not being given unconditionally, about it being tied up in a lot of “shoulds”. Terry Pratchett in the Tiffany Aching books talks a lot about the going around to the houses, and how it keeps you human. I actually made a note of the quote where Granny Weatherwax ends an exchange with Tiffany with the words: “Stars is easy, people is hard”.  And at the moment I am finding people hard, so I think I am reverting to my old habits of closing my heart off to those close to me. And I know it is not healthy, and it’s not even what I really want. It is an old pattern of protection, a girl’s defence when she lacked the options, opinions and knowledge of a woman. It is time to let it go. As the guidebook entry about The Laume says:

If you are pushing and pushing at something, it can often help greatly just to back off, relax about it and let the energy flow.

The guidebook goes on to talk about random acts, but in my case, I know the unconditional giving starts at home. With acknowledging that while I am performing acts of emotional labour realizing that it is part of my love language and take that back. Stop framing it in an accounting transaction. Of course, having slipped into that habit it might be difficult to step out of it. But, what I know now, that I did not know when I began this blog post is how to open my heart again.

Love and a re-opening heart,

Here is the exchange between Tiffany and Granny Weatherwax which takes place in A Hat Full of Sky:

Miss Level, and possibly Oswald, watched them go from the gate. ‘She’ll be fine with your little men [the Nac Mac Feegle] keeping her company,’ said Mistress Weatherwax as she and Tiffany turned away and took the lane through the woods.  ‘It could be the making of her, you know, being half dead.’
Tiffany was shocked. ‘How can you be so cruel?’
‘She’ll get some respect when people see her moving stuff through the air. Respect is meat and drink to a witch. Without respect, you ain’t got a thing. She doesn’t get much respect, our Miss Level. ‘
That was true. People didn’t respect Miss Level. They liked her, in an unthinking sort of way, and that was it. Mistress Weatherwax was right, and Tiffany wished she wasn’t.
‘Why did you and Miss Tick send me to her, then?’ she said.
‘Because she likes people,’said the witch, striding ahead. ‘She cares about ’em. Even the stupid, mean, dribbling ones, the mothers with the runny babies and no sense, the feckless and the silly and the fools who treat here like some kind of a servant. Now that’s what I call magic – seein’ all that, dealin’ with all that, and still goin’ on. It’s sitting up all night with some poor old man who’s leavin’ the world, taking away such pain as you can, comfortin’ their terror, seein’ ’em safely on their way … and then cleanin’ ’em up, layin’ ’em out, making ’em neat for the funeral, and helpin’ the weeping widow strip the bed and wash the sheets – which is, let me tell you, no errand for the feint hearted – and stayin’ up the next night to watch over the coffin before the funeral, and then going home and sitting down for five minutes before some shouting angry man comes bangin’ on your door ‘cos his wife’s having a difficult birth to their first child and the midwife’s at her wits’ end and then getting up and fetching your bag and going out again … We all do that, in our own way, and she does it better’n me, if I was to put my hand on my hear. That is the root and heart and soul and centre of witchcraft, that is. The soul and centre!’ Mistress Weatherwax smacked her fist into her hand, hammering out her words. ‘The … soul … and … centre!’
Echoes came back from the trees in the sudden silence. Even the grasshopppers by the side of the track had stopped sizzling.
‘ And Mrs Earwig,’ said Mistress Weatherwax, here voice sinking to a growl, ‘Mrs Earwig tells her girls it’s about cosmic balances and stars and circles and colours and wands and … and toys, nothing but toys!’ She sniffed. ‘Oh, I daresay they’re all very well as decoration, somethin’ nice to look at while you’re workin’, somethin’ for show, but the start and finish, the star and finish, is helpin’ people when life is on the edge. Even people you don’t like. Stars is easy, people is hard.’

26 September: Ta’Om the Poet (Reversed)

Good morning,

Today’s faery card is Ta’Om the Poet but he is head over heels. Ta’Om is a story teller and in order to tell stories, one needs to pay attention, and see the world as it really is.
He speaks to me of the fact that you cannot discover stories when wrapped in one’s own little world…you need to open your eyes.

Terry Pratchett, in the thoughts of Tiffany Aching in the Wee Free Men says:

The secret is not to dream … The secret is to wake up. Waking up is harder. I have woken up and I am real. I know where I come from and I know where I’m going. You cannot fool me anymore. Or touch me. Or anything that is mine.”
I’ll never be like this again, she thought, as she saw the terror in the Queen’s face. I’ll never again feel as tall as the sky and as old as the hills and as strong as the sea. I’ve been given something for a while, and the price of it is that I have to give it back.

And the reward is giving it back, too. No human could live like this. You could spend a day looking at a flower to see how wonderful it is, and that wouldn’t get the milking done. No wonder we dream our way through our lives. To be awake, and see it all as it really is … no one could stand that for long.

After we are awake, part of our challenge is to tell our stories…to bring them back into the world in the way that makes sense. Ta’Om is reminding me to be properly awake, he is warning me against sleep walking and wondering blind through the world, missing out on the amazing stories that are all around. The connections that we can make.

Love and stories,

27 August: The Pook

Good morning,

Today’s faery is one of the Challengers: The Pook…a shape shifter who encourages us to see things as they truly are. The Pook reminds us that there are no absolutes and to look at the world and see all the colours. But as I am typing this I am reminded of a Terry Pratchett  (whose last Discworld book, The Shepard’s Crown, is out today) between Reverand Oats and Granny Weatherwax:

(The conversation starts on the classic subject of “how many angels can dance on the head of a pin?”)

“You’ve counted sixteen?” said Oats eventually.
“No, but it is as good an answer as any you’ll get. And that’s what you holy men discuss is it?”
“Not usually. There is a very interesting debate raging at the moment on the nature of sin, for example.”
“And what do they think? Against it, are they?”
“It is not as simple as that. It’s not a black and white issue. There are so many shades of gray.”
There’s no grays, only white that’s got grubby. I’m surprised you don’t know that. And sin, young man, is when you treat people as things. Including yourself. That’s what sin is.”
“It’s a lot more complicated than that–”
“No it ain’t. When people say things are a lot more complicated than that, they means they’re getting worried that they won’t like the truth. People as things, that’s where it starts.”
“Oh, I’m sure there are worse crimes-”
“But they Starts with thinking about people as things…”

Source: Carpe Jugulum recorded over at Gaiam Life

It is easy to forget that people are people, and as such are made up of stories and connections, and hopes and dreams and fears and to want them to fit into our reality. It’s an easy temptation to think that we should be able to manipulate them the way we would if they were puzzle pieces and we were the builder, but the truth is we can’t. We can’t even completely control ourselves…our feelings are completely organic and spring up on their own, we can only control our responses to them.
So today I think that my job is to be mindful of the fact that sin is when you treat people as things. Because that is where the shoulds come from.

Love and challenges,

PS. If you were wondering about yesterday’s post title having extra random letters they were brought to you compliments of Lucas.

Geeeeeooo The Slooow (Reversed)


Today’s daily faery is Geeeeeoo The Sloow on his head. Now Mr Slooow is the master of slow processes. All of the processes that he watches all happen in good order. In his introduction in the Faery’s Oracle Jessica Macbeth writes:

Geeeeeooo doesn’t understand why we rush about so, missing out on the slow changes in the worlds around us. He is amazed at the stress and the problems we create for ourselves by doing that. He wonders how we can survive if we don’t sit down and watch the sunrises and sunsets or if we “don’t have time” to enjoy our lives — especially if we are so busy rushing around with the idea that we are making things good for ourselves later but never now.

The presence of a reversed Geeeeeooo can indicate that unnecessary delays or stalling may be going on here. Geeeeeooo may be in charge of slow processes, but they should be actually proceeding and not stuck.

Geeeeeooo’s presence, especially with the warning about stuckness is very interesting in the context of having Nelys give me a visit two days in a row. I am not entirely certain what is going on but I suspect that Nelys has said okay great you have started some things and have started pulling at the strings, Geeeeeooo is asking me to consider what I actually want to achieve and to put together a plan of action with the next steps.

In the Hogfather Terry Pratchett writes:

The path to wisdom does, in fact, begin with a single step.
Where people go wrong is in ignoring all the thousands of other steps that come after it.  They make the single step of deciding to become one with the universe, and for some reason forget to take the logical next step of living for seventy years on a mountain and a daily bowl of rice and yak-butter tea that would give it any kind of meaning.  While evidence says that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions, they’re probably all on first steps

So while pulling at the strings is a good first step a logical second step is to stop and consider where I want to go, and then put together a plan about how I want to get there. The next logical step in the series of the thousands of steps is to actually implement those steps.

While generally I don’t do follow up questions to a daily faery card (it’s purpose being to provide some general guidance for the day) I think today I may end up making an exception.

Step one in any oracle reading (in fact I think this is where the power of oracle’s lie) is to figure out what the question is.

So I am going to go and feed my dogs and consider where I want to go before I ask for some guidance along the way.

Love and confusion and continuation,

13 March 2015: Himself

Good day,

My daily faery today is Himself. An archetypal masculine energy. The guardian of the Hunter and the Hunted. Himself is the one who dances the great dance of life and death. Death came an took one of the great influencers of my life by the hand the other night. Sir Terry Pratchett is no longer present in the world. And yet, as he himself pointed out for as long as a person’s actions continue to have consequences that person is not really dead. Terry Pratchett’s writings will continue to have consequences. His words and his worlds have inspired me (and I am sure other people) to stop and think, to rage against injustice. To consider the fact that doing nothing is what can hurt someone. To recognize that judging is human but to try and temper that judgement with understanding and to consistently try and be a better version of myself.

In the guidebook Jessica Macbeth writes that

Himself speaks of protection, either of the querent or of someone that the querent owes protection to, like a child or an elder.

In this case I need to protect my son by taking care of myself. In a parenting workshop I learned about the CALMS method:

C – Check in with yourself (know what you are feeling and experiencing)
A – Allow a breath (don’t force it, just let a breath come)
L – Listen (what is actually the problem)
M – Mirror (be empathetic)
S – Soothe

So today I know that my best will be not the greatest, but it will be the best that I can give today in a state of sadness. I will continue on moving forward as a human.

Love, grief and understanding,

%d bloggers like this: